This morning, I came out of a short meditation session that included my two older sons and a lecture to them reminding them why it was beneficial to sit in quiet before they start their day. I gave them a refresher on how it helps them stay calm and keep a clear mind when they move through the day. Once we finished meditating and got up to go out of the room, I kicked my toe on the corner of the bed and immediately yelled, “What thhheee fuck!!!” Of course the boys looked at me in confusion and my smart ass middle son looked at me and said, “Maybe you should meditate some more.” My reply was a side eye and a low toned, “Get out of my room.” Once they left, I tried my best to muster up feelings equal to those of a hypocrite because I had been teaching them calm and balance, but all I could come up with was a quick fuck that and I kept it moving.
I’m obsessed with the idea of being in balance and functioning from a place of compassion. I like Deepak Chopra. I like Super Soul Sundays. I follow yogis on Instagram. I’ve happily dabbled in veganism and the like. I write and say daily affirmations. Hell, I make my CHILDREN meditate. I’m all about speaking in positives to keep attracting positive energy into my life. I also like to curse. I mean a hardcore, F-bomb-laden, make you clutch your pearls comedic ramble from time to time (RIP Bernie Mac). Well, a lot of the time. I’d like to think of myself as a version of the urban zen master Russell Simmons, and we all know how that dude will curse in one breath and hand you a smoothie with the next. I like that. Enjoy it even, but does that make me a hypocrite when it comes to this new age, #blackgirlmagic, peaceful approach to life that I love oh so much? I don’t believe so. Here’s why:
1. It makes things a million times funnier.
I don’t think I really have to explain this reason, but if Chris Tucker had just said, “You got knocked out”, would that have been as funny as the actual line? Nope. Without that memorable line (I won’t say it), we might not have had the pleasure (or torture, your choice) of seeing him in ALL of those Rush Hour movies. Plus laughter is good for the soul, right?
One thing that’s common among every type of artist, is their ability to communicate their imagination through their particular medium of choice. Just think of a painter; that one little stroke of magenta elevated their painting from nice to spectacular or the photographer who was able to make an image pop because of a small adjustment in lighting. I’m a writer and I’m all about placing the perfect emphasis on an important thought and sometimes a strategically placed muthafucka can do the trick. And that’s written and spoken.
I’m a strong believer in keeping one’s temple tidy, and I feel cleansed every time I let a four letter word rip. It’s as if I’ve let the build up of sarcastic observations out just by saying that one shocking, sometimes harsh curse word. There are thoughts that don’t quite make it to a post, article, or journal and sometimes the energy they carry deserves a place outside of my mind. It would be doing the world a disservice to keep all of that brilliance to myself (lol).
4. It’s a sign of intelligence.
Okay…this reason is the cousin of reason #2. Intelligence will usually exhibit itself through wittiness and what’s wittier than a cleverly situated expletive inside of a perfectly timed observation? What more do I need to say about that one? You have to be visionary to make a nasty word fit into an otherwise PG statement and not offend the present company.
Well…it is. It just is. I get a hardier laugh from some people when I curse and I might get a look of guilty enjoyment from the next and that’s fun for me. The reaction is nice because it let’s me know that I have one tool in my back pocket that can lighten the mood, or break the ice. I enjoy that in some warped way, it edifies the service oriented part of my personality. I brought some joy (uncomfortable maybe) to the next person and it goes to my higher purpose.
Don’t get me wrong, I don’t curse at every opportunity or in every situation. I’ve been doing it long enough to know when to shut it off. I don’t really curse in front of the kids (at least not on purpose) so I am conscious of not passing that along to them before we have a conversation about context.
I don’t believe it to compromise my consciousness either. I’m always aware of the things that are most important in life, the injustices in the world (especially for Black people), healthy living, and empowerment of my sisters and brothers. As a matter of fact I think a good cuss word goes along beautifully with some of those things. I’m sure I’ll keep building my repertoire of dirty words for the rest of my life. You have to stay on top of your skills at all times.
Do you curse a lot? Come on, don’t lie.